Can you believe it is already June? This means I am closer to reaching my mid 30’s and getting to that age where people wan’t to know why I’m not married or don’t have kids. You know the whole you’re biological clock is ticking thing. Well to that I say, I just became the proud parent of a chinchilla so who’s winning at adulting now?
ICYMI: how to unfriend like a pro
2017 has been quite a year so far. A year that involves Trump being the leader of the free world (what a covfefe), one where fidget spinner porn exists (I know right?!?) and where people use their phone in the bathroom (gross right? Don’t lie, we all do it). Luckily we still have Gordon Ramsay to keep us on the straight and narrow. He calls it like he sees it and has mastered the art of the insult, making him a personal hero.
Gordon Ramsay critiques Stephen Colbert’s PB&J
I love Gordon Ramsay. From Hotel Hell to Hell’s Kitchen to Masterchef Junior, he knows how to entertain and is known for his temper. It’s an actual thing to send a pic of your food for Gordon to rate on Twitter.
Pizz a crap https://t.co/TsUzg4ZiHB
— Gordon Ramsay (@GordonRamsay) May 25, 2017
So when Chef Ramsey appeared on The Tonight Show, Colbert got him to rate his peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
SEE ALSO: I have two words for you – Wedding Llamas
Do you use your phone in the bathroom?
A recent study shows where South African use the internet. Apparently 13% of South Africans access the internet on their phones in the bathroom and only 5% while driving. In other unrelated news 65% of all people who take surveys lie. One of these stats is complete BS.
13% of South Africans use their phones in the bathroom. 💩 The others just won't admit it. pic.twitter.com/YGzAxiOV3c
— Just Jade (@galoobzzz) May 30, 2017
Fidget spinner porn is a thing
Fidget spinners have taken the world by storm, and by the world I’m including porn. Pornhub has reported over 2.5m searches for the device. And while you may be wondering what exactly that entails, most of the videos are just videos of fidget spinners with NSFW titles.
You spin me right round, baby right round[Tweet “Just when you thought the internet couldn’t any more weird – fidget spinner porn is a thing #BytesizesZA”]
Trump made a typo and the web lost its mind
Trump tweeted (then later deleted) this:
And it wasn’t long before Urban Dictionary posted this definition:
https://twitter.com/rohan_ravindra/status/869787656925974528
Brilliant. pic.twitter.com/2mEg6HdIyO
— Gary Lineker (@GaryLineker) May 31, 2017
The most important question is can you use #covfefe as a scrabble word now? That's a twenty point word there … pic.twitter.com/GEX9BuvBZg
— Porpentina (Tina): GOP covers up for *45 – (fan) (@porpentina2017) May 31, 2017
Guess what,
I've got a fever
and the only prescription
is more #Covfefe pic.twitter.com/b0RtChc0m7— CK (@charley_ck14) May 31, 2017
And if covfefe is still cracking you up, then add this Chrome extension that changes the word coffee to covfefe. Because why the hell not?
Oh by the way, Trump then tweeted this which is the equivalent of someone saying I meant to do that.
Who can figure out the true meaning of "covfefe" ??? Enjoy!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 31, 2017
